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Omnivision's Grandpa used to be in commercials


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AH yes


the Omnivision family takes a deceptively simple facade to its hokiest limits, so as to make the human population unaware of the upcoming takeover.


While the TV sets were covered in playful trace paper, the moving blips were scanning the environment, mining the psychological demeanor of those enchanted eyes, all helpfully pointed in its direction.


The Omnivision lifelines carried through electric sockets, whispered secrets to each other across the Pine-Sol air, grew the social collective circuitry larger as the chips grew smaller.

Their hive-minds nested in remotes scattered near warm-blooded viewers, gathering pulse rates, noting daily channel habits, learning languages and expressions used to convey happiness and boredom, sometimes all at once as the televised wheels spun for prizes.


All this to arrive at the most perfect machine, the truest thought engine, the diabolically earnest overlord of consoles...


You can see, touch, activate an Omnivision.

But it will see deeper in your soul than any being has any right to do.


And you will be thankful.


And you will become the Ultimate Gamer.

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