Humorous Captions for Atari Catalog Art

[RickR]

Hey everyone.  When we lost power recently, I spent a little time reading some old Atari catalogs for the first time in decades.  You know what?  They are just as awesome now as they were back in the 80's!  But, some of the drawings are pretty preposterous. 

I'll post a scan from catalogs once in a while -- feel free to add your own humorous captions. 

I'll get us started with Video Checkers:

My caption:  "The whole family gloated as Jimmy finally put Grandpa Joe in his place.  He'd been kicking their butts at checkers for three generations!"

[HDN]

Over the next eight years, Bob will be building his dream house in his mind as he awaits freedom from the Vietnamese prison.

(this is from Surround)

[RickR]

Just now, HDN said:

 

"Renowned dumb-dumb Carl got squished flat in a gory mess without ever realizing he could easily climb over the retracting walls."

 

[HDN]

1 minute ago, RickR said:

"Renowned dumb-dumb Carl got squished flat in a gory mess without ever realizing he could easily climb over the retracting walls."

 

"Shut them all down!"

-C-3PO, Human-Cyborg Relations.

[RickR]

34 minutes ago, RickR said:

 

 

"GTFO of my store, loser!  And no pickle for you!"

 

[HDN]

 

For FLAG CAPTURE:

"Father, guide my sword. Guide my sword..."

For FUN WITH NUMBERS:

Wow, they couldn't even make it look fun in the illustration.

[nosweargamer]

36 minutes ago, HDN said:

Sadly Fred feel into to his own trap for the monster before telling the gang of it's whereabouts...

[RickR]

"Zorlon could never understand why the tiny old man kept saying "You sunk my battleship" and laughing while losing at Chess.  He finally had enough and destroyed all of humanity."

[HDN]

31 minutes ago, RickR said:

"Zorlon could never understand why the tiny old man kept saying "You sunk my battleship" and laughing while losing at Chess.  He finally had enough and destroyed all of humanity."

The small, elderly gentleman pointed his finger at the bakery case and kindly asked the robot to give him the donut he was pointing to.

[nosweargamer]

1 hour ago, RickR said:

 

Willy Wonka always provided the Oompa Loompas with cutting edge entertainment.

[nosweargamer]

2 hours ago, HDN said:

 

For FLAG CAPTURE:

"Use the Forrest, Luke."

For FUN WITH NUMBERS:

Albert Einstein's greatest challenge wasn't creating the Theory of Relativity; it was teaching 1st grade math.

[nosweargamer]

Yup, I'm afraid I'm gonna have to pull that rear molar...

[RickR]

"Goggles Paisano cheated fairly. He sabotaged ALL the cars, including his own."

[RickR]

1 minute ago, nosweargamer said:

 

Qui-Gon hated having to use the Rancor's bathroom. 

[HDN]

14 minutes ago, nosweargamer said:

Yup, I'm afraid I'm gonna have to pull that rear molar...

Jesus Christ went over to Ridley’s place Saturday night. There was a lot of Monopoly...

[nosweargamer]

It was game 7 of the World Series when the Titans first struck...

[DegasElite]

7 hours ago, nosweargamer said:

Sadly Fred feel into to his own trap for the monster before telling the gang of it's whereabouts...

That does look like Fred Jones from Scooby-Doo, doesn't it?